I have a love/hate relationship with the company that is Disney which can best be broken down as follows: I love the theme parks and hate most of the movies. I do enjoy some of the older Disney films however. You can see the difference between Walt’s Disney and the modern beast it has become. As a young child I first saw Disney World’s Magic Kingdom during its 10^th anniversary year and two rides stuck in my mind and heart forevermore: The Haunted Mansion and The Pirates of the Caribbean.

Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean (PotC) is one of the greatest dark rides of all time with legions of fans in Disney parks across the world. However, in 1997 a far too PC California brought an unforgivable and heinous change to the Spanish Main. Please draw your attention to this cutting from the wikipedia article on the ride PotC (I’m aware that wiki is not the best source for correct information, but in this case they are correct, I’ve checked my facts it was just easier to present it in this format):

In its original form, the Disneyland attraction had a subdued, yet interpretively racy scene in which pirates were shown chasing attractive females in circles (achieved by simply animated figures on turntables hidden below guests' view), along with a comical reversal in which an overweight woman was seen chasing a pirate. Some were offended by this depiction and in response, Disney initially changed the woman chasing the pirate by having her try to hit him with a rolling pin. Then, in 1997, this sequence was changed so that the pirates now are pursuing women holding pies, and the large woman is chasing a pirate with a stolen ham.

Originally, one pirate was shown exhausted from his pursuit of an unwilling female, brandishing a petticoat as guests floated past, and uttering suggestive dialogue including "It's sore I be to hoist me colors upon the likes of that shy little wench," and "I be willing to share I be." Behind him, the woman would pop her head out from her hiding place inside a barrel. This scene was altered in the American parks, but it is still the same in the versions at Tokyo Disneyland and Disneyland Paris.

The "Pooped Pirate," as he was called, was dubbed the Gluttonous Pirate and was recast in the 1997 refurbishment as a rogue in search of food. His dialogue included lines such as "Me belly be feeling like galleon with a load of treasure," and "I be looking for a fine pork loin I be." The woman hiding in the barrel was replaced by a cat.

At the Magic Kingdom, the chase scene was altered to show the pirates making off with various treasure as the formerly "chased" ladies attempt to thwart them. The "Pooped Pirate" here is holding a treasure map in his lap and a magnifying glass in one hand. His lines here include "This map says X marks the spot, but I be seein' no X's afore me." The woman in the barrel remains, though this time she is hiding a small treasure chest inside the barrel with her.

The modifications garnered criticism from longtime fans and some of the original Imagineers of the Attraction. In Jason Surrell's book Pirates of the Caribbean: From The Magic Kingdom to the Movies, showwriter Francis Xavier "X" Atencio refers to the "softening" touches as "Boy Scouts of the Caribbean."

What madness was that? Would that have been Walt’s decision? Would he have caved to the pressure of PC groups that want the entire history of the world retconned and softened to meet their agenda? And do not think for even a minute that those dykes don’t have an agenda. As can be seen from the clipping, even original Imagineer and writer X Atencio was unhappy with the changes.

But what exactly was the purpose of softening the ride? It was already soft enough. It was not history, it was amusing fantasy. The pirates of PotC are eternally locked in a routine that belies the true horror of a pirate raid upon a 17^th century Spanish town. The pirates chased the women eternally but never caught them. The city burns for all time and no matter how long those pirates call to that dog he’s never going to move. It was a rollicking, jolly version of history. It was never claimed to be real. But this was not good enough for some people who claimed offense at this humorous pastiche of legend, history and literature, and thus is was changed. Many long time fans were offended by what was removed and what was then put in its place, but that carried no weight it seems. This is the result of the weakness and stupidity that is PC thought and action. Suppose we endeavored to teach as well as entertain; would the modified PotC suit? I think not. Those offended people that cause such a fuss as to have an attraction that was decades old changed to suit there sensitive natures would no doubt faint dead away were the ride to depict the true scenes of a pirate raid upon a town: the murder, the bloodshed, the raping, and wantonness. These comic scenes were safe, for as a child I did not know why the pirates were chasing the women only that it was funny and as an adult I laughed again, only for a different reason. That original edition was fine for a generation of children and their parents who were made of sterner stuff. Sadly now it has all become a nightmare of marketing and pabulum designed to appeal to everyone equally so that no one can truly enjoy it. No unique flavors allowed.

That is my love/hate relationship with Disney. I respect the late Walt Disney for what he created and what he saw that could be, and I hate the Disney corporation for what they have become. They have become faint: indistinct on the Media Landscape and lacking of courage. Walt once said that they must never forget that it was all started by a mouse. No, Walt, it was started by a man; it was destroyed by a mouse.